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1. I talk to jackie for 30 minutes who “transfers” me (I think “let me transfer you” is comcast-ese for “let me hang up on you”)

2. I talk to Jessica, who puts me on hold for 30 minutes while she “finds someone who knows about cable cards” (i.e. hopes I go away)

3. I talk to Stephanie, who “transfers” me once again

4. I talk to Randy, who, I just got off the phone with. Surprise surprise! Sends out a tech. Next Sunday. Despite the fact that I told her exactly what is happening, and that I know that, courtesy of this link, the problem is that my card is not configured correctly (which I found while trying to fix it myself, courtesy of Tivo’s Extremely Helpful Tech Support Pages (NOT SACRCASTIC! Thank you tivo for bein a lone voice of intelligence in a sea of Comcast dementia).

So that’s four calls tonight coupled with the three this morning (and not including Jessica’s call (!)). The other calls were because our phone and internet went out again. I called the “Executive Escalation” line to ensure that the issue wasn’t the incorrect address, as it was the last time the phone went out. She assured me it wasn’t. I called the regular comcast tech line, to make sure that the problem wasn’t the address. I again was assured it wasn’t. I called one more time, all sneaky like, to make sure they had the right address associated with my account. I talked to Keith, who told me there were actually 3 addresses (WTF?!?!?!) associated with my account, but wouldn’t tell me what they were, and again assured me that the address wasn’t the problem. The tech fixed our phone issue around 2:00 PM – I’ll give you one guess what the problem was.

Oh, Comcast Cares gurus, where are you? You gave me so much hope that this would all be fixed when you first contacted me. Instead I’ve had to call comcast and get the runaround EVERY SINGLE F___ING DAY I’ve been home since I ordered this service. It’s getting rediculously hard for me to not just blow up at every single person I talk to.

(I know this picture is about flash, but just substitute “comcast” where appropriate and you’ll get the gist)

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Although maybe they shamed “Mrs Jefferson” into actually doing something, because she called to tell me that she had rescheduled my appointment to tomorrow! Yay! Except it was tomorrow between 11-2, which I can’t do because I work for a living. So it got re-rescheduled back to next Wednesday the 20th. A week and a half for the Comcast Glorified UPS Guy to com hand me two cable cards.

Also, get this: apparently you can’t change your address over the phone. I know this because they got my address wrong. How they did that, I don’t know, because I started my account online. The lady I talked to to reschedule my appointment said she needed to contact a dispatcher (WTF?!?!?!) to change my address.

..and then so last night I get the automated “how did your install go?” phone call, which I answer truthfully, then I get connected to another service rep, so says “what happened?” so I tell her the whole spiel. Her response can be summed up with “well, that ain’t right” – no options to make things right, no explanations for what happened or attempts to find out where the process went wrong – just sympathy that it got messed up. I don’t want sympathy, that’s why I have this blog. I want someone to take action (or responsibility).

She also told me that a) Technicians aren’t allowed to change work orders, b) I have to go to a Comcast store to change my address (WTF?!?!) c) her supervisor was “at lunch” (8:00 PM) but she would talk to them (I thought about the whole wrong work order / general miscommunication within comcast, but actually it was to see if I could pick up cable cards from a store (which I already knew I couldn’t from previous phone conversations, and told her as much)) and call me back. Which, astoundingly, she did – I had assumed that she was just getting me off the phone, much like Mrs Jefferson, previously – but at 11:54 PM!!!!!! Six minutes to midnight, I get a phone call from a comcast rep just to tell me that no, in fact, I can’t get cable cards from a store. Thank you soooooooooo much. Also, that 9:00 PM limit that Mrs Jefferson talked about? Maybe they should make that an actual rule instead of an Excuse to not talk to a manager….

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